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HELL

YES

ONE OF MY KIDS WON THE RECITATION SPEECH CONTEST

BOO YA

I felt like I could stay in Japan forever if it meant getting to experience that moment of pride at seeing your kid’s hard work pay off and just dominate all the other speeches (minus one other really good student) and then your student freaking getting handed that giant trophy at the end that will be displayed at school and every time I walk by from now on it I get to say to myself, “Oh yeeeeah, I helped make that happen" and there might even be a mini awards ceremony at lunch and when I see the principal hand my student that trophy again, I can allow myself that moment of maternal/teacher pride knowing I not only added another accomplishment to my school’s reputation but also made a difference in this kid’s life. THIS FEELING IS AMAZING

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jkottke:

A poster on Reddit asks: What are two events that took place in the same time in history but don’t seem like they would have? A few of my favorite answers (from this thread and a previous one):

When pilgrims were landing on Plymouth Rock, you could already visit what is now Santa Fe, New Mexico to stay at a hotel, eat at a restaurant and buy Native American silver.

Prisoners began to arrive to Auschwitz a few days after McDonald’s was founded.

The first wagon train of the Oregon Trail heads out the same year the fax machine is invented.

Nintendo was founded in 1888. Jack the Ripper was on the loose in 1888.

1912 saw the maiden voyage of the Titanic as well as the birth of vitamins, x-ray crystallography, and MDMA.

1971: The year in which America drove a lunar buggy on the moon and Switzerland gave women the vote.

NASA’s Gemini program was winding down at the same time as plate tectonics, as we know it today, was becoming refined and accepted by the scientific community.

Spain was still a fascist dictatorship when Microsoft was founded.

There were no classes in calculus in Harvard’s curriculum for the first few years because calculus hadn’t been discovered yet.

Two empires [Roman & Ottoman] spanned the entire gap from Jesus to Babe Ruth.

When the pyramids were being built, there were still woolly mammoths.

The last use of the guillotine was in France the same year Star Wars came out.

Oxford University was over 300 years old when the Aztec Empire was founded.

When pilgrims were landing on Plymouth Rock, you could already visit what is now Santa Fe, New Mexico to stay at a hotel, eat at a restaurant and buy Native American silver.

The first wagon train of the Oregon Trail heads out the same year the fax machine is invented.

Nintendo was formed the same year Van Gogh painted Starry Night.

Cleopatra (the last Pharaoh of Egypt) lived closer to the moon landings than she did to the building of the Pyramids of Giza.

When Kublai Khan became the Mongol Emperor, the first humans were setting foot on New Zealand.

Related: true facts that sound made up, timeline twins, and the Great Span.

Source: jkottke
Answer
  • Question: please describe what it is like to live in the us?? - Anonymous
  • Answer:

    iguanamouth:

    every morning my alarm gun wakes me up by firing directly over my head and if i dont immediately get up and sing the star spangled banner i get arrested. all matters in court are settled with opponents dressing up in bald eagle costumes and fighting to the death. theres an american flag tattooed across my face. once i saw someone get punched in the head repeatedly at a barbeque because they said they didnt like apple pie and nobody helped them. nobody even tried

Source: iguanamouth
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karlosmadera:

I’m still torn on whether this is the greatest thing I’ve ever done or the stupidest. 

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(via soapyporridge)

Source: karlosmadera
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salt-and-pepper-panda:

busket:

mybodythehandgrenade:

brinconvenient:

tonidorsay:

gailsimone:

chrishaley:

Done and done.

(Not pictured: “Butt window”, but trust me, it’s there.)

You have no idea how much this cheered me up just now.

Bwahahahahahaha

I for one, think this is a major improvement. Look how empowered he is! And it’s relevant to the character as someone who is powered by the sun, he’d want to maximize the amount of sunlight he receives, right? It’s not like it makes sense for him to cover himself from chin to toe.
In fact, I think some strappy sandals might be an improvement.

strappy high heeled sandals would increase his height making him closer to the sun. and if wonderwoman can fight in heels it can’t be that hard, right?

c’mon the artist could have dEFINITELY shown us the butt window too, like at the same time as a the chest window. like you just have to twist him in a way that shows us the butt but also turn the chest around a little so we see that too? superman is a tough guy im sure he can handle breaking his spine to show off all those important windows

(via aromulanongallifrey)

Source: thechrishaley
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makanidotdot:

this is my only hypothesis

(via rufftoon)

Source: makanidotdot
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tastefullyoffensive:

Movies That Can Be Described With The Same Sentence

(via cosyblankets)

Source: tastefullyoffensive
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haikyuubabee:

Haikyuu × Tokyo Ghoul

Haikyuu went from feel-good adorableness to creeptastic horror in two seconds flat

haikyuubabee:

Haikyuu × Tokyo Ghoul

Haikyuu went from feel-good adorableness to creeptastic horror in two seconds flat

Source: haikyuubabee